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If it's too difficult, you'll get anxious. Csikszentmihalyi says flow lies in between boredom and anxiety: if something's too easy, you'll get bored. The feeling is not the same as simple physical pleasure. The rock-climber or musician can "lose themselves … and time goes by", Professor Bloom says. Rock climbers can enter a 'flow state' when they're intensely engaged. The term "flow state" was coined by the Hungarian-American psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi to describe being immersed in something difficult or effortful that is utterly fulfilling.Ĭsikszentmihalyi's examples are often physical, like rock climbing, or creative – musicians, writers or poets practising their craft. That's something you've probably experienced if you've ever been so involved in a tough activity that you've forgotten a school pick-up, gone hours without eating or simply not noticed the passing of time. Push away thoughts of a massage for a moment and go for something more challenging – it's more likely to bring you "flow". The joy of losing yourself in a difficult stateĪctivities to bring you happiness mightn't be the ones you'd think of first. Paradoxically, he says the best way to be happy is not trying to be, but rather by seeking out other goals or activities. "There is a strong relationship between people who say, 'I spend a lot of my time trying to be happy' … and people who are not happy." "Seeking out happiness – trying to be happy – is, in an interesting way, self-defeating," he says. He argues that for everyone, focusing on pleasure while avoiding the hard stuff – like the stressful tasks, the sleepless nights, the bloody toes – is no way to feel fulfilled.